Dance Moves

Steve gets a Boner on X FACTOR

Nigella Talks Dirty

Dance battle

Voicemail Accident Hilarious

When this guy calls his boss to tell him he’s running a little late, he witnesses a car accident and begins the best play-by-play commentary you’ll ever hear.

Right after the car accident happens, the caller states that a man gets out of his car as if the other car was at fault. What happens next is pure entertainment.

The witness leaves the literal blow-by-blow action to his boss while laughing hysterically.

Apparently this is the real deal, and how could it not be? This is too good to make up.

Streaker on Ninja Warrior

Kiss Cam

Romantic Ex Called

I received a phone call from a gorgeous ex-girlfriend who, last night, called 'out-of-the-blue' to see if I was still around.

We lost track of time, chatting about the wild, romantic times we used to enjoy together.

I couldn't believe it when she asked if I'd be interested in meeting up and rekindling a little of that 'old magic'.

WOOT! I was flabbergasted.

'I don't know if I could keep pace with you now', I said, 'I'm a bit older and a bit slower and balder than when you last saw me. Plus I don't really have the energy I used to have.'

She just giggled and said she was sure I would 'rise to the challenge'.

'Yeah.' I said. 'Just so long as you don't mind a waistline that's a few inches wider these days! Not to mention my total lack of muscle tone...everything is sagging, my teeth are a bit yellowed and I am developing jowls like a Great Dane!'

She laughed and told me to stop being so silly.

She teased me saying that tubby, gray haired, older men were cute, and she was sure I would still be a great lover.

Anyway, she giggled and said, 'I've put on a few pounds myself!'

So I told her to fuck off...

Ken M - Master Troll

100 Year Old Horny Grandmother

Sad Animal Diaries

Kids Are Basically Tiny Versions Of Drunk Adults.

They'll pretty much just take a nap whenever they want, wherever they want.

They always make faces like this...

And this...

Pretty much lose all of their dignity in public.

Their depth perception is always fucked up too.

Can't get food in their mouths no matter how hard they try.

They're unable to predict when they're gonna pass out.

They have absolutely no coordination.

There is no sleeping position too uncomfortable.

They often fall asleep on or near toilets.

They constantly misjudge their strength and coordination.

And terrible at judging distances.

They're obsessed with finding something to eat.

But usually don't make it that far...

They draw on each other when they pass out.

And can often be found with their head in the toilet.

Credit Card in CD Reader?

Captain Kirk's guide to fighting

1. The Kirk Kick

2. The Kirk Drop Kick

3. The Bowling Ball

4. The Human Projectile

5. The Kirk Chop

6. The Wall of Destruction

7. The Scissor Choke

8. The Kirk Double Fist